Good morning Reader,

Most people struggle to do this. I know I do.

It is my biggest challenge as someone who loves sales and is also the biggest issue for most people who sell.

What am I referring to?

The art of Self-regulation. Or as some call it Self Control.

Or as I call it ‘Learning when to keep your mouth shut’ 😂

In last week's email, I shared 5 critical characteristics we all need to show if we want regular sales success.

Being self-aware was the first one, but the ability to exercise some form of self-control is just as critical.

Here are 5 sales scenarios where ‘Self Control’ has a huge impact. All of these could occur with one prospect and in each scenario being able to control when you say something is VITAL in order to ensure the deal moves forward and in a good commercial way.

1. You meet a potential prospect at a networking event who has a problem
2. The same prospect tells you something which you don’t agree with
3. The prospect in meeting two asks you to describe your company or service
4. The prospect asks you to tell them the price of your service
5. The prospect wants your service but asks you for a discount

To make this come to life in a way that you will resonate with, I want to introduce you to Mr No Self Control and Mrs In Control 😀 Let’s discuss all 5 scenarios with these 2 characters in mind!

Scenario 1

Networking is a brilliant way to meet potential new customers. If you network in the right way that is.

Some people go to networking with a curious mind and with the intention to meet people which MAY then turn into a connection and business.

Others go to networking with the intention to sell their stuff to anyone that will listen. That sadly is Mr No Self Control.

He doesn’t know what self-control is! When the prospect he has just met talks about a project they have been working on, he can’t resist the urge to speak and talk about the big projects he is working on. It's like a competition for Mr No Self Control. How can they outdo the other person?

Mrs In Control however realises that although they could open their mouth and say something, the clever response is to say ‘Ah that sounds interesting, tell me more about the project. What challenges is it creating for you’?

Just a few moments later, as a result of having some self-control, Mrs Self Control finds out that the problem the prospect faces is exactly what they do.

Result 1 - 😀

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Scenario 2

After mentioning to the prospect that it's an area you focus on and after sharing a few ideas which they found useful, you connect up and arrange to speak. They are intrigued by how you could maybe help them solve the problem.

When you meet, they tell you about something which you know (you are the expert in that area) to not be true.

Mr No Self Control can’t help themselves. They hear the comment and immediately shake their head and say ‘no that’s not the case, this is what happens’ and then proceed to lecture the prospect. They get their point across but the prospect feels like they have been preached to and leave the meeting thinking they need to find an alternative solution.

Mrs In Control however realises there is a time and place to question things and when it is done, it must be done in the right way. They pause, hear the prospect share what they think and then ask ‘what has made you feel this way?’. The prospect then says it's just their view on things but are open to new ideas if someone can show them new information.

Mrs In Control thanks the other person for being so open and shares a research study that shows new information. The prospect looks on and smiles. They say ‘wow, i got that wrong, thanks for sharing’ and think to themselves ‘This person is nice, they really do know their stuff.’

Result 2 - 😀

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Scenario 3

Within the same meeting, the prospect asks the seller to describe their company or service.

Mr No Self Control thinks they are in. They see it as a chance to talk about themselves and what they do. They go on for 10 minutes about how great they are. The prospect nods in boredom but then makes an excuse to finish the meeting. They reconfirm to themselves they want to find an alternative solution provider to Mr No Self Control.

Mrs In Control doesn't work that way though. They know that it's not about them. Resisting the urge to talk for a long time about what they do isn't really what the prospect wants to hear. There is a reason for their question. In a soft and engaging tone, they say ‘I could share lots about what I do but what would be of most interest to you’?

The prospect thinks it's nice to be asked and then says they are keen to know about how the service achieves results as they have been burned in the past.

Mrs In Control listens intently and probes further into the worries. She then spends a few moments outlining how her company is different. The prospect is left feeling heard and listened to and asks for some pricing.

Result 3 - 😀

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Scenario 4

The prospect asks for pricing.

They didn’t want to ask Mr No Self Control but they were keen to get an alternative quote to see if the other provider they spoke with were good value. They sent an email but Mr Self Control (thinking he is in - because he has no self-awareness!) phones and then provides the price and proceeds to tell the prospect why that is such good value. 5 minutes later, the prospect can’t even remember what the total figure was. They talked over their pricing so much.

Mrs In Control replied back to the email to ask if she could meet up to discuss pricing. They arrange a time and then Mrs In Control outlines the figure she charges and then says ‘How does this fit within your budget plans’. She waits and looks at the body language and signals given off by the prospect. She see’s they are pretty comfortable with the figure presented.

She starts to think this is a deal that could now happen!

Result 4 - 😀

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Scenario 5

The prospect loves the service but their business partner has asked to see if they can get a discount.

Mr No Self Control wasn’t even asked. That’s how far his approach got! 😂

Mrs In Control listens to the request. She stays calm. She pauses, counts to ten and shows that she is thinking about but before she even says anything, the prospect says ‘Actually, don’t worry. I think it's good value as it is, we are happy to move forward'.

Mrs In Control says thanks and offers a bonus service as a thank you to the prospect which makes them smile and feel they have gained something. Mrs In Control is happy as it's a service which is already pre-built and which doesn't come at much expense.

The deal is done and Mrs In Control gets the contract signed there and then before going home to celebrate.

She stayed in control, stayed calm, resisted the urge to talk and say something that could cause her issues and won the deal in the end.

Mr No Self Control on the other hand looked at his list of lost deals, moaned about how he wasn’t winning business but then said the issue must have been with the prospect. Easier to blame than to be accountable!

I hope these stories of 2 people show you how important it is to have some self-control!

It can be the difference between winning and losing deals.

Don’t be Mr No Self Control! Be more like Mrs In Control 😎

Stay tuned for next week and the subject of Socialisation 🙂

Until then wishing you all a brilliant week ahead. Keep smiling and stay focused on becoming a fly on the wall of the brain of your buyer.

James

P.S.

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